Reflections on St. Mary's Class of 2003 (and college Class of 2011 & beyond)

In 1998, I embarked on a new journey.  For the first time in my youth basketball coaching career, I was working with a 3rd grade girls basketball team.  Prior to this, I had worked with boys and girls from 6th to 8th grade.  Coaching a 3rd grade team was both an exciting challenge and a daunting challenge as well.  Exciting in the sense that I got to mold the kids skills when they were young.  Challenging in that I didn't feel I had all the necessary experience to work with the younger kids.

Well, I did the best I could for three seasons (1998 to 2000) and compiled a 21-13 overall record including spending the 1999 and 2000 seasons competing in the top division of the basketball league we were playing in.   As the 2000 season completed, I stepped down from coaching as I had spent over 12 years as a volunteer coach with 7 different teams (boys/girls) in both assistant and head coaching capacities.   The team also broke apart as several of the kids left St. Mary's for other schools.  Another coach took over the next season as my former team merged with the kids from the upper grades for two seasons (plus their 8th grade season as an individual team again) and led them to several deserved championship runs.

My most enduring memory with this particular team is back during their first season in 1998.  The team compiled an 8-0 league record but unfortunately another team had also finished 8-0.  Instead of the usual 9 teams, there were ten teams and the schedule did not have my team play the other team.   With both teams tied, we had to play a tiebreaker which my team lost 14-9.  That send the other team to the championship game while my team was dropped into second place and awaited the winner of the 3rd/4th place playoff winner.

Even though my team was the second seed, we traveled to the opposing team's gym and engaged in a classic battle.  With my team up 10-8 in the closing seconds, the other team banked home a shot at the buzzer to send the game into overtime.   My team battled hard in overtime but ultimately lost a 13-12 heartbreaker to end our season.

Why would a loss be an enduring memory?  The reason is that my team was always resilient and it showed in the next two seasons.  We played against the best teams the league had to offer and we competed well.   Some of the other teams in the league had players that ultimately played varsity for some Catholic high schools out here and I believe one even played college basketball.

This reflection comes as I noticed on Facebook that a few of the nine players that played under me are GRADUATING from college in the coming weeks.   CONGRATULATIONS to all of the ones who are graduating this year.  For the others who may graduating later on or even on different track from school, best of luck!

Your Perception Is Not My Reality And Vice Versa (Personal Edition)

In the last few days, a double murder and suicide at San Jose State University (SJSU) has attracted a lot of comments and speculation.  Read the articles below for more information on the situation:

San Jose State killings blamed on domestic dispute

SJSU students killed in shooting to get posthumous diplomas

The comments and speculation surrounded on two items:

1.
Why a 54 year old man and a 25 year old woman be married? Love?  Money?  Green Card?

2.
Was the 25 year old woman and the 26 year old friend that were killed having an affair or were they just friends?  They were both married though the man had separated from his wife (at least for a time).

I'm not going to comment directly on either of the questions because I don't have the answers.  I'll leave that to the police / investigators to figure out.  However, what I can say is this case teaches us that "Perception vs. Reality" in friendships / relationships is an important thing to consider.

For me, it is perfectly normal to just be friends with people of the opposite sex.  I have plenty of friends of the female persuasion both single, attached and married (don't think I know any divorced female friends).  While having friends of the opposite sex is a good thing in my mind, I've learned that things change when they are attached and especially when they are married.

The main thing is that my female friend's significant other's take priority.   I don't take it personally because every other friend is probably treated the same way.  However, with me being a GUY, there is additional significance that I didn't think about in my younger days.

In MY REALITY (and all of my female friends realities), there is NOTHING going on between us.  That stuff we can control.  What we can't control?  The PERCEPTION of their significant others.  Therefore, when associating with your attached/married female friends, you have to tread carefully and not give any wrong ideas that something is going on.   There is no one right way to proceed as every couple of different.  My female friends let me know where the lines / boundaries are and I don't ever get close to crossing them!   The good news is that I know the husbands pretty well and that helps me out!

This "Perception vs Reality" issue could have been one of the things (among many others) at play here in the SJSU situation.  The husband's perception was of infidelity and affair.  The two young people indeed may have been just friends.  However, their actions (being in a car together at 8:30 PM in the evening) may not have portrayed reality and that caused the husband to lose his mind.

The husband definitely should not have done what he did.  It is unfortunate what has happened and that has caused the loss of three lives.  Best wishes to the families involved in this time of grief.

I Am Not Young Anymore..........

As much as I like to think I am young, the fact is age is slowly creeping up on me.  The reason I say that is that my knees are screaming out at the punishment I put it through today:

1.  Officiated three basketball games from 9 AM until 12:30 PM
2.  Played pick up basketball with friends from 2 PM until 5 PM

In fact, this past Spring, I have put my body through some punishment:

1.
Officiated a JV basketball game at 4:30 PM, played an adult league basketball game at 8 PM at one gym,  and played another game at 10 PM at another gym.

2.
Played in TWO tournaments this past Spring plus played in a Monday night league.  That equated to playing FOUR games in 3 Days after the first tournament and playing FIVE games in 3 days after the second tournament.

I used to officiate and play basketball afterwards on Saturday frequently but I don't do it as much anymore.  My legs have trouble taking the punishment and eventually I'll have to figure out what I'm going to do in the future.

For now, I'll ice down my knees and get some rest.  :)

Enjoying The Simple Things.....

Today was a great day and not because of anything super special I did.  Firstly, I met up an old friend for lunch and we caught up on our happenings over the past couple of months.  My friend had been busy with work and went on vacation while I had been busy with my various things so we hadn't talked on the phone or met in person in a while.   It didn't really bother me as my friend will always reach out to me when time permits and it was just a matter of time we met up again.

After lunch, I had to go home to take care of some personal business for a short while.  After that, I left my car at home and took a walk around my neighborhood.  I had planned to take a walk to the shopping center (2 miles away) but thought it might be too much effort to hit the mall.  Instead, I took a pit stop at a local strip mall.  There were some chairs so I sat down and just enjoyed the sun and the small breeze.

After a little while, I walked back home and got a call from another friend.  I chatted with my friend for a while before having dinner.

While I didn't really do anything particularly special, I loved catching up with my friends and having some solo time to myself.  :)

Some Days You WIll Never Forget / Osama Bin Laded Killed

There are some days in your life you never forget.  For me, a couple of days stand out:

October 17th, 1989 - The Day of the Loma Prieta Earthquake in the San Francisco Bay Area.   I was at the Polo Fields at Golden Gate Park in SF for a cross country meet when the earthquake struck at 5:04 PM.    Not being close to buildings, I wasn't aware at how large the earthquake was until my team and I left the park and saw the power out.  It took me several hours to get home due to buses getting delayed with power all over the City.

September 11th, 2001 - This day began as any other day for me.  I was up at about 4:30 AM and got on a commuter train to go to work at 5 AM or so.  I spent an hour on the train and another 30 to 45 minutes on a shuttle to get to my office.  Obviously, as I was commuting to work, the 9/11 terrorist attacks in New York had started but I had no idea.

I arrived at the office to a co-worker telling me that a plane had hit the Twin Towers in New York.  My co-worker thought it was a small plane.  As I tried to get onto CNN's website to see what was going on, I COULD NOT.  I tried a few other news sites and had the same problem.  Obviously something major had happened.  It would be a few hours later when the news finally broke.  My co-workers and I spent most of the day in disbelief.

May 1st, 2011 - Let's add May 1st, 2011 to the list of days you never forget.  On this day, President Barack Obama announced that Osama Bin Laden (leader of Al Queda and person who plotted 9/11 attacks) was killed in a US Military operation.  I'll save the whole political discussion about this news for a later time, but it definitely is a historic day.

The Introverted Extrovert

Recently, I received an email from an author.  The author had written a couple of books that I had read.  The subject was interesting enough that I took a class from the author about a year or so ago and he keeps in touch every now and then with folks who have taken his class.

In reading the author's email, I stumbled upon an interesting article published in the Boston Globe:

The Power Of Lonely (may require registration to read the article)

In this article, the author surmises that certain tasks and though processes are better done ALONE than other people around.  In fact, the article suggests that the most developed personalities and leaders are the people who devote the appropriate time to taking some solitude for themselves.

How this applies to myself?  I was a pretty shy and introverted kid during my early school years though I improved as I went through high school and college.   It wasn't that I didn't talk to anyone.  It's just that I talked to people I felt comfortable with but I didn't particularly branch out much.  Especially during my years leading into high school, I didn't have a lot of hang out friends.

Thanks to an old friend from high school, I broke the mold and she became one of my early friends that I hung out with and talked to a lot (though that friendship has since faded into the sunset).   It was from this friend that I met some people that are still my friends today.  With a few of the friends, we don't hang out as much as we used to because they have families and other things to concern themselves with.

The thing that has changed is that I am now much more of an extrovert.   I find myself curious about everyone I meet and I could hold a conversation on just about anything if given a chance.  So while some of my older friends are busy, I have simply branched out to other folks and life goes on.   The best example was during my birthday a few weeks ago.  I was out with no less than three groups of friends (with some friends crossing over into more than one group).  

I've got a reputation among some friends that I like to talk a lot.  It's a reputation that I've earned because in the past I have spent a ton of time with my friends on the phone (and still do with some people).   But as I have gotten older, I don't feel I need to talk to my friends as much.

I also need that ALONE TIME that is mentioned in the article above.    With this alone time, I do a great many things.  I read, I mediate, I write/blog, I take photos or just do whatever comes to mind.   I think this may surprise people for my reputation among my more recent friends is being a talker, basketball / sports person and or just a very socially active person.  All of this is true to a certain extent.

However, I am easily comfortable with being alone and going off to do whatever I want to do myself.   It's been a while since I've done so but I have seen movies alone previously.  Since I am currently unemployed, I may hit up some movies that have come out recently.

Everyone should take some away time for themselves.  I understand this more than I did when I was younger.  It's very beneficial and something you should work into your life schedule.

Bell's Palsy / Watching Over Our Parents

About two weeks ago, I was home and my mom complained to me that her face was a little distorted and that she was having trouble swallowing food and spitting things out of mouth.   Upon taking a look at her, my mom's face was indeed a little "distorted".  But beyond those symptoms, she seemed to be fine.  She was walking, talking and otherwise moving around without any problems.   Alas, she had told me relatively late in the day so it was too late to call the doctor to schedule an appointment.   My mom didn't think it was serious so she initially wanted to just rest and let things heal on it's own.

On other hand, while she seemed OK, I insisted she call and schedule an appointment with her doctor the next day.  During the evening, I did some research online and discovered something called Bell's Palsy.  Bell's Palsy is inflammation of some facial nerves which cause partial paralysis on one side of the face.  That is why my mom's face looked a little distorted because the facial muscles were locked into place.  There is no direct correlation with Bell's Palsy and getting a stroke.   The good news is that the majority of the paralysis eventually goes away over time though some medication is involved.  

At the doctor's office the next day, it was confirmed that my mom had gotten Bell's Palsy (which could occur for many reasons) and not a stroke.  In thinking about things, it was silly to not have my mom checked up earlier though.  

Unfortunately, as all our parents age, we have to keep an eye on them for sometimes they don't know what is going on.  While my mom seems OK now, I am keeping a close eye on her just in case.  It's good that I am unemployed and have time to be at home.  

Appreciate Every Moment, For It Will Never Come Again......

Last night, in my Monday Night Open Division spring basketball league, my team (Red) defeated our opponents (White) 64-48 to advance to the league championship game next week.    My team led the game from beginning to end and there was not a lot of drama.   It was a stark contrast to the Fall season, when my team (who was also Red) had to rally from a 10 point deficit to win and make it to the championship game.

Having made it to the championship and winning it last season, I didn't put any particular importance to my team's win last night.  However, one of my teammates and I were talking afterward and he pointed out that he would now be playing in his fourth consecutive championship game in the league.   I thought that was interesting and it got me to remember that I myself would be playing in my THIRD consecutive championship game in the league as well (all on the same team as the guy I was talking to).  That made me appreciate our win last night a lot more!

The other interesting thing I did yesterday was to hang out with my friend.  We didn't do anything super noteworthy.  We had lunch, talked and collected points that got us some rewards.  I should mention I used those rewards to buy something today!  While my friend and I didn't do anything crazy, it was definitely a unique experience that I appreciated a lot.

The point in all of this?  Even in moments of life that you don't necessarily think is important, they are all unique and should be appreciated.   For someone who didn't win my first championship in this particular league until last fall, it surprises me that I am now playing in my third consecutive championship game.

If I were to somehow were to repeat playing in three consecutive basketball league championship games again in the future, it would be under different circumstances and an entirely new experience.

Remember to appreciate every moment (good or bad) in life for once it passes, you'll never get a chance to experience it exactly the same again!

I Love Vegetables!!

It's a bit of an odd topic tonight but I can be pretty random sometimes!   In thinking of my diet these days, I can't imagine NOT eating vegetables.  I eat bok choy, cabbage, broccoli, brussels sprouts, peas, corn and just about any vegetable out there.  There is one minor exception.  I've never been a fan of eggplant.

In thinking about my life, I don't if I always had vegetables.  In my younger days, my mom usually cooked vegetables at home but I didn't make a point to eat vegetables outside of home.  In fact, when I was grammar and middle school, I eat a LOT of McDonald's fast food for lunch.

When I got to high school, I started to learn a little more about a healthy diet.  Because I ran cross country (and was a fencer), our coach encouraged us to get more carbohydrates.  That's when I started eating a ton of pasta.  In fact, since my layoff, my default lunch at home is usually a bowl of pasta.

In recent years, as I got older,  I realized eating healthy was important.  I'll still get some occasional fast food but for the most part, I try to get vegetables in my diet as much as possible.   If I brought in lunch to work, I'd make sure there would be some vegetables (left overs or frozen).  If I went out to buy lunch, I'd usually pick meals with some sort of vegetable present even if it was fast food.

When eating dinner at home, my mom still makes a ton of vegetables which I gladly consume.  The funny thing is that I am not really a salad person.  I'll eat one every now and then (Fresh Choice is good) but I don't out of my way to eat a salad.

While American culture is typically a meat and potatoes one (and I let meat and potatoes), vegetables are also an important part.  If you don't eat vegetables frequently, you should try.  They are quite good for you!

2.99 GPA And Some Old College Memories.........

It's been a couple of weeks since my layoff and all is good in my world.  There's been a few job leads but I am not overly concerned about how they turn out.  I've taken my time to finish up my final paperwork to complete my departure from my company, clean up the house a bit and just relax a bit.

One other thing I've been doing is researching information on graduate school.  There's one program that I had looked at during my last layoff back in April 2009.  However, when I got rehired at my old job in September of 2009, I didn't look at the graduate school program again.  With the layoff hitting me again though, I am seriously looking at graduate school again.

In doing my research yesterday, I found out that the graduate program I was considering requires a 3.0 GPA.  That was a bit of a downer as I knew my overall GPA from college was around 2.86.  In digging a little further, I found out that the graduate program was just looking at my last 60 semester units.  That made feel a little better as I had done better in the last couple of years before I graduate than my earlier years.

I had pull up my old transcripts from college and upon doing the math, my overall GPA from my last 62 units was.........2.99!  That was pretty frustrating and got me to think "What if I had done better in this one class or another class?"  Alas, those thoughts didn't stick around long as there's nothing I can do about it now.

However, in reviewing my old college transcript, it did bring up an old memory I hadn't thought about in a while (and it could have made a difference in my last 62 unit GPA).   There was a class that I had received a grade of C in that I should have gotten at least a B instead.

What had happened was the lecturer graded the class on a curve.  Usually, when a class is graded on a curve, it's to help the students on the lower end of the grading scale to pass.   I think most of my fellow classmates thought the same.  However, when the final grades were distributed after our final, I was given a C grade despite scoring 85% (or somewhere around there) in the class.  Basically, our lecturer had went on a curve and RAISED the standards since the class was not terribly difficult.

I wasn't the only one who got stuck with a C in the 85% range.  A bunch of classmates tried to complain but it didn't get us anywhere as the lecturer had warned us upfront he was grading on a curve.  Who would have though that class could have implications over 13 years later?

All complaining aside though, with a 2.99 GPA, it looks like I will have to take a class, get an A, and get my GPA about 3.0 to apply for the graduate program I was looking at.   While this is a little frustrating, it is also a benefit.  I haven't been in school in a while so taking a class to boost my GPA will also get me back into school mode.

Opening Up To Different Perspectives.......

From my youth through my high school days, I didn't really have a lot of close friends.  I had some buddies I hung out with but not being with the popular crowd, I didn't really have someone I talked to consistently about "life issues".

Toward the end of my high school years, I finally found one really good friend and we remained close for many years. I talked to this particular friend about most (if not all) of my life issues for the duration of our friendship.   Alas, as this friend lived in the East Coast, distance and life in general spelled the end of this particular friendship.

Unlike my younger days, I had met some other friends throughout my college years and many of them remain my friends today.  These friends are usually the first ones I go to and discuss my life issues with.   As I have grown up and matured, I realized I don't need to talk to my friends about "every thing" that happens in my life.  

However, as I have matured, I have realized that I don't have to just rely on my "close friends" for perspective on things.  I am fortunate to have a HUGE circle of people to draw from.   I can draw on my fellow basketball players or officials for perspective on things.  In fact, tonight I officiated some basketball games with a fellow official who had been laid off in January.   That was definitely a topic of discussion because of my recent layoff.

Last night, I spent a good amount of time talking to the girlfriend of one of the guys I play basketball with.  She's quite a few years younger than me but awfully mature and we had some nice discussions over a few different topics.

My friends like to make fun of me in the fact that I "talk a lot".  There is some element of truth to this as I do like talking to my friends on the phone.  What some of my friends haven't seen is that I just don't talk to "shoot the breeze".  I have realized I have a natural curiosity over many things and I can discuss almost any topic under the sun.

So while my close friends will remain my close friends, I am 100% open to talking to others about anything they want to talk about or if something catches my fancy.  It's actually quite refreshing!

A Different Level Of Basketball......

Today concluded a super busy weekend for me.  I formed a team to play in a Easter basketball tournament and we played two games Saturday and two games Sunday.  In addition, I met up some friends for dinner after the tournament Saturday and I attended an NBA game after the tournament on Sunday.

Overall, I felt the tournament was a success.  My team consisted of two separate groups of people who I played with previously and we meshed together pretty well.  We won two games and lost two games to finish in 3rd place.

My team was really a middle of the road team in this tourney and it was reflected in the games we won, the games we lost and how we finished.   My team had plenty of guys who have played league basketball before but not at a super high level.  We also had a couple of guys who didn't play much organized basketball before but we were able to make up for it.

In first game we won Saturday, we beat an older but somewhat inexperienced team.   This team was pretty tough inside but struggled with their shots and our team played solidly enough to pull off the win.  In the second game we won today, we played a young and inexperienced team.   My team didn't play particularly well but had enough in the tank to knock off the young kids.

However, the two losses reflected many of my team's weaknesses.  In our first loss on Saturday, we played some early to mid 20's guys who just ran circles around my team offensively and defensively.   Their youth and athleticism was just too much of our team to overcome.

In our second loss this afternoon, we played a mixed team with vets (over 35), guys in their prime (25 to 30) and young kids.  The story of this game?  Defense.  The mixed team came out in their man to man defense and suffocated my team.  We were just not used to the level of defense that was being played.   The older guys used their experience to clog all our passing lanes and contested all of our shots.   The younger guys took advantage of our tired legs on offense.   This was a tough game and showed why defense is so important in basketball.

In both cases, if my team had played more together and got more time to gel, we might have a better chance against the more organized teams.  Alas, my team was just playing on the fly and that was why we struggled against the better teams.    As it turned out, the two teams we lost to this weekend ended up playing the championship with the mixed team beating the young kids in overtime.

My days of competitive basketball are winding down but it was fun play in the tournament with my team.

Quote Of The Day

"If you're on the path you're meant to be on, everything falls into place; the Universe is telling you that. If you are not on the right path, you will experience roadblocks all along the way, and this is also the Universe telling you to stop, look, and ask if this is where you are supposed to be."


— James Van Praagh


This quote was something I shared with a friend a while back.   With my layoff, I was thinking about this a bit.  The layoff is obviously a rather large roadblock.  So while I am poking around for job leads related to what I've been doing, I am taking some time to think about the distant future and see if the "Universe" / "God" / "Whatever suits you" has plans for me. 


I'll let you know when I figure out what my plans are! 

The Layoff Aftermath

It's a late Wednesday evening / Thursday morning as I write this.  It will be a week since I unexpectedly got laid off from my job.   While the title of this posting makes it sound like something bad or bad happened after my layoff, in reality NOTHING earth shattering happened.

I didn't jump off a cliff, bang my head against a wall or curse out my luck, bosses or anything else for that matter.    I talked about things with a few people last Thursday.  I wasn't too emotional and was pretty rational trying to figure out what exactly happened.

The next day was my birthday and I spent my day relaxing.  I had lunch with my parents and went shopping at the local mall for a while before going home to rest for a bit.  I then headed out to dinner / dessert with friends and had a good time.  While my layoff was discussed, I didn't express my bitterness and actually was my normal jovial self.

Saturday, I spent the day officiating basketball before going to dinner with another group of friends for another birthday celebration.  This time, the celebration was for two other folks plus me.  Once again the layoff was discussed but not too long.

Monday, I replied back to a ton of emails from my former co-workers who expressed disbelief at my layoff and gave me some best wishes.  I also took care of submitting my unemployment papers as well.   Though I was not intending to job hunt, I ran across some job postings so I reviewed them as well.

Tuesday, I spent time reviewing my severance papers and understanding what I was signing.  I have to return the papers in the next couple of days to complete from departure from my company.

Wednesday, I actually started the job hunt by talking to a recruiter.  The recruiter actually had two leads for jobs and I got another email later with another lead.  Whether they will come to fruition is another story but it's good to see I have some options.

As Thursday dawns, everything is all positive on my end.   I left my job last week in a state of disbelief.   In the week sense, I've gotten over it and moved on.  Sometimes when these roadblocks occur, it is life telling you that you should going another direction.  What that direction is I don't know 100% yet.

However, I am in the process of figuring it out and will take everyone once I decide which way I am going.  :)

In Sales, It's All About The "Numbers"

In just about any job, you generally have a set of general company goals and employee specific goals that you are evaluated against.  These evaluations will determine many things such as raises or even if you KEEP your job (for those that do their jobs poorly).

Salespeople likely have these same things but there is ONE overriding factor above all else:  The dreaded QUOTA.  What is a quota?  The amount of revenue (aka "dollars") that is required to be brought in by a salesperson over a given time period (monthly, quarterly, etc).

If you've ever wondered why salespeople are so pushy when it comes to homes, cars or other things they sell, the quota is the reason why.  If salespeople don't meet their quota consistently, they don't have a job.  Sales is a tough job and I've asked various salespeople why they work in the industry.  The respond that they like the challenge of selling and the excitement of closing a large deal.

The flip side of this is that even if the salesperson does everything 100% correctly, their jobs and livelihood could depend on the consumer signing the contract.   Imagine if all your jobs were dependent on others??  The only other job I can think of that could even be close if Project Managers.  Project Manager have to depend on other people to get their jobs without being their direct manager.  That poses challenges in of itself.

Prior to my time as a Sales Engineer, I didn't really understand the sales process and what salespeople went through.   As I've been supporting a sales team for the past few years, I've gotten a great understanding of what the salespeople go through on a daily basis and they have earned my respect.

Life has a way of repeating itself

This morning, I was informed by HR and my team VP that my job position was being eliminated due to budget cuts. This was not pleasant for several reasons.

One, I had already gone through his once before two years ago to the day. The reasons in 2009 were the same as they were today. It was about the budget and not about my performance.

Two, as with two years ago, tomorrow is my birthday. Of course with the end of the month and quarter coming, there is nothing that could be done with the timing.

I leave with my head held high. I had my struggles last year but worked through them as best as I could. Many people in my office and team were surprised that I was let go.

What's next? In the short term, going to enjoy my birthday the next few days as I have some dinners. Beyond that, we will see. I will take some time off and focus on some hobbies (not basketball as I do that enough). I may jump into photography more and get back into sportswriting a bit.


- Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone

Enjoying the simple things in life

Up in Tahoe this weekend and having a food time. My friends and I are keeping things simple. While most of us have experience skiing and snowboarding, it was bypassed this time die to logistics. There'd were kids and elders where they wouldn't able to participate much in skiing and snowboarding.

While there wasn't adrenaline based activities, we did have fun in the snow and just hanging playing pool and board games.

This goes to show that hang out activities do not have to be extreme to have a good time. That is the general attitude I take with my friends. Let's enjoy ourselves whether we are hanging out or just talking on the phone. After all, as long as we enjoy what we are doing, it doesn't matter what the actual activity is.


- Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone

Shoveling Snow In Lake Tahoe

In Tahoe with friends and the house we are staying at is full of snow. We are shoveling away to clear the driveway so we can park our cars.




How do people do this constantly in the east coast do this?

- Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone

Five Years And Four Months Ago......

Five Years and Four Months is a long time.  That would put things around the month of December in the year 2005.

Looking back at December of 2005, I was still employed at SBC Internet though unknown to me at that time, I would leave about 5 months later for a job at a startup.  I was still officiating high school basketball at that time as well.

But looking back at that time there was going to be a significant change in life for me.  During December of that year, I had went to Las Vegas to hang out with a old school friend who had flown in from the East Coast on a work assignment.   That would also be the LAST time I would hang out with my friend.  It was a few weeks later when I lost my cool and put a chill on our long time friendship.

In looking back, the situation should not have been unexpected.  My friend and I had gotten into a disagreement a few years prior.  Though we had settled the issue, I had personally grown a bit disenchanted with my friend.   The distance between us was great and I put in a lot of effort into the friendship which I didn't think my friend reciprocated.

Five years and four months later, I can see clearly now that the break in this particular friendship needed to happen.  There are a few reasons for this.

One, I had become too dependent on my high school friend over the years.  I had made them my best friend.  I talked to this person about everything and asked for advice.  Alas, my friend didn't look at me this way.  I knew this but still treated them in a slightly one sided fashion.  While I had a few other friends, I had neglected developing them very well.

Two, I wasn't a very mature person and perhaps I was being selfish in expecting a lot from my old friend.  Plus, I was narrow minded and didn't consider other alternatives in the form of other communication methods or just talking to other friends.

In looking back at how this broken friendship benefitted me, I can see a few things:

One, I expanded my myself from ONE best friend to several groups of friends.  There's a few different groups of people I hang out with.  They may be groups of old friends, basketball buddies or just other folks I have met over time.  I have a couple of old friends I talk to the most on the phone.

Two, with experience comes wisdom and with wisdom comes maturity.  With maturity comes the realization that life isn't just about YOU!  I was a little selfish with my friend back in 2005.  I've realized that for a while now.  It just didn't occur to me how much!

In the old days, I would call my old friend every couple of days just to jabber about stuff and ask advice. These days, if I am lucky, I'll talk to my two old friends once a week.  In fact, one of my old friends and I haven't talked in about a MONTH recently due to work.  Yet, I've emailed and texted them to say hi.

This particular friend of mine is great about calling back and when they don't call back, it usually means they are pretty busy.  I've been mature enough to accept this and continue on with life until we touch base again.

I could go on all night but let me summarize.  Things in life do happen for a reason.  The broken friendship was NOT fun at all.   Yet as I look back at the friendships I built and some maturity I've gained in recent years, it was a required process that I had to go through.

Though I probably hurt my old friend and may need to make amends one day, the learning process was definitely something I needed to go through.

Weird Night At The Gym / Career Night #2

The sports of basketball can bring you the highest of the highs and the lowest of the lows.   Tonight, I think my team went through both the highs and the lows all in one night in our Thursday Night Friendship Basketball League against Team Blue.

For whatever reason, my team came out frigid offensively.  It didn't matter if we were shooting jump shots or layups, nothing was falling.  Team Blue also took advantage of some defensive match ups and took an early 14-0 lead.   My team called timeout with 14 minutes left and zero points on the board.

I knew the team was struggling and tried to get myself going.  I wasn't exactly scorching hot but ended scoring my team's first 6 points (8 points overall in the first half) of the game to keep us afloat.  The rest of the team finally followed suit.  Despite falling behind 14-0 to Team Blue, we were only down 33-21 at halftime.   My team even pulled a Chris Webber moment to add to the weirdness in the first half.  We called timeout when we had none and that cost us a point and possession as well.

The second half was a bit of a blur.   I remembered trying to get going early and missing.  However, the shots that weren't falling for me early finally starting going as I got into the zone and my team slowly clawed back into the game.  I scored 21 of my career high 29 points in the second half.

I know we eventually tied the game but immediately fell back behind the next possession. Both teams went back and forth a bit as Team Blue held on to a slim lead.   With about 30 seconds or so left, there was controversy.  My team was down two and got the steal and was cruising for the layup but the referee called a tough traveling call.   That definitely hurt and put us into a tough situation.   Team Blue got the ball and we had to foul them to let them shoot free throws.   Fortunately Team Blue made only 1 free throw and my team had a chance as we were only down 3 points at 52-49.

I dribbled the ball up the court and with several teammates setting screens, I was left wide open for a three pointer from the left wing and nailed it with 10 seconds left to tie the game.  Team Blue had a chance for a final shot but fortunately missed and that sent the game into overtime.

In the overtime, both teams went cold as no one could score for the first 1 1/2 minutes of overtime.  I personally rushed a couple of jumpers which frustrated me.  However, with about 25 seconds left, I finally got the ball again and knocked down the only shot for both teams in overtime for the 55-53 win.  Team Blue tried to tie but was unable to and my team pulled out the victory.

As you can see, this was a weird game but I am glad we won.  As for my career high 29 points, it was great to be able to score a lot AND help the team win.   There weren't stats kept so not exactly how well I shot.  My guesstimate is I shot around 50% or maybe a little below as I did take quite a few shots tonight.

Adding to the statistical weirdness, my teammates were consistent tonight.  My 7 other teammates combined for 13 points in both the first half and the second half.

All in all, it was a fun evening trying to carry my team and being the hero.  I'm normally a role player but for one night, i got to be the star.  My legs and body are paying for it a little bit but I'll enjoy it the next few days.